What does success mean to you?
Most people want to create success so that they can have security, stability, and feel safe.
we're drawn to create comfortable lives and we also want to feel like what we're doing is meaningful. We want to feel needed by our tribe and our communities. We want to belong. We want to contribute to and support our families. This is what most people would define as success.
Ironically, it's our very obsession with trying to make things happen on the outside that often keeps us from actually realizing these goals, no matter how noble they may be.
Our culture is obsessed with creating ‘success’ yet many reach for lofty goals unaware of their true underlying motives.
It's common for those who crave 'success' do so out of necessity to fill the gaps in their emotional bodies that were left open from unformed memories in their childhoods. You don’t need to have grown up in a broken family to have self-sabotaging beliefs. Often times it’s our parents beliefs about money, success, happiness, and their own feelings of safety and security that we take on as our own. There’s a lot of influencing factors responsible for the belief systems that cause you to look for the answers outside of yourself.
It’s great to see conscious leaders using this powerful motivation which fuels them to find solutions to heal the earth and it’s inhabitants, and fast. We have a ton of great knowledge, tools and resources and incredible technologies and things are changing more rapidly than ever recorded in history.
So what’s stopping any of us from having immense super abundance and success in all areas of our lives?
The answer for most, lays in the heart.
Within each of us is a child like love that doesn’t think in plans and numbers. This pure, innocent and loving energy wishes to play, sing and dance. Above all else it needs connection.
In our mission to succeed and create something of ourselves we’ve pushed aside our innate need to connect deeply, so as to not get hurt, and hinder our efforts of achieving success. As a woman that has spent her entire life learning how to be strong and independent so that I wouldn’t need anybody, I know exactly what I’m talking about. I felt alone and I needed to keep myself safe which meant:
a) work hard,
b) control my environment, and
c) eliminate debilitating emotions
This naturally led me to work from home, distance myself from most people and rarely leave the house. I didn’t want to open up to relationships with anyone because I didn’t want to get my heart broken. I didn’t want to get hurt, rejected or abandoned. If I didn't let anyone in, they couldn't hurt me. You can't lose what you don't have.
While these qualities can be found in anyone, it’s especially evident to me in the rising of the divine feminine. As men and women emerge from lifetimes of suppression we have wounds to heal and hearts to feel.
Which means being vulnerable.
And letting go of control.
Your inner child will not let you have 'success' if it feels it will cause even further separation. If you already don't take time to truly, deeply connect with others and/or creatively express yourself, then why would you do so when you're 'successful'. The inner child doesn't believe you will have time for them because you will be busy and have many more excuses and responsibilities. How you do anything is how you do everything. So you'll keep unconsciously self-sabotaging your efforts until you pay attention to your inner child/subconscious mind, and begin to nourish your soul with the things you believe you'll be able to do only after creating success. (the formula is backwards)
It doesn’t matter how amazing your plans are to many a lot of money, revolutionize the world and build epic businesses, if your heart isn’t on board, it’ll be an arduous trek. You'll battle procrastination, endless distractions, take on other people's problems and likely have weak boundaries. Good news is the solution is so juicy, and satisfying and you will see positive results immediately following taking the following actions:
Open up. and tell people how you TRULY feel. You’re gonna have to get real. Let others in. stretch yourself. Let your walls down. Find somebody you trust and be completely uncensored and open with them. Don’t hold anything back.
Real, Vulnerable, Raw
Ask for help. You might not NEED the help, but asking for help opens the channel for exchange, connection and you get to practice receiving. Know that receiving is the opportunity for another to give and it's equally important.
Do something kind for someone without attachment or expectation. Try doing something really big for someone. It doesn't have to involve money. Give someone your undivided attention. Acts of kindness open the heart fast. It feels amazing.
You just need to get some energy moving, so open the gates and put yourself out there.
Take a risk, try something new. Ask your heart what it wants and follow it’s seemingly random curiosities. Make a practice of compassionately moving towards your fears, a little bit each day.
PLAY. Your inner child wants to sing and dance and play. It doesn’t matter if you’re a 42 year old male or a 76 year old woman, WE ALL HAVE within us a tender and innocent heart of a child wishing to express freely without reason, without judgment, for the pure reason of exploring our curiosities. We need connection, we need play, we need love.
I promise if you make space for these things in your life (scary or challenging as they may feel) you’ll have endless energy, support and inspiration to funnel towards your big goals and dreams!
Play. Connect. Release. Receive.